Nobody Knows Who I Really Am... ( Lyrics of 'Life is Like a Boat ', a song by Rie Fu)

well, aftr some time passed, i still can't really adapt with all this sh*tty math things that i have to do in my work, i work as an accountant, something that i really2 wont enjoy at all :-( really... then i still have to deal with my college again, i missed another lesson, AGAIN. that's becoz i have 2 work from 8 till 5 in the aftrnoon and the class starts at 2 in noon, so sh*tty, isn't??? i cant stop thinkin' that i've been tricked by this college, be4 i enter it, the marketing staff said that it will be either morning or evening classes only, but whats with this piece of damn crappy bullsh*ts that says i have to attend the noon class??? i really dont get it! i don't even know when will i evr graduate from this sh*tty college. i really had made the wrong choice in selecting the right college.

in career, i had problem with my simple-minded brain, some task 4 me are pretty tiring and also complicated, but i try to survive, in the name of him. dont get me wrong, i'm not talking about God here, no. u all know what i mean by saying 'him', here, i'll give u his initial, A. E. have u guessd, i bet u have a clue about it or even figure it out if u're someone close to me. he's so irritating recently, he cut wounds all ovr my heart everytime i tried to be closer again to him. i never know what's wrong with me, why does he hate me so much? is this because of my sicko mothr? i'll never know i guess, i've been holding my 'lust' to kill myself with a lil' cowardnes, i dont know when will i release this cursed, wounded, and pain then kill myself. i feel tortured, i feel always being pressurized almost evrytime i speak with my mom and sis. they're showing that they really dislike me and wanted to get rid of me. it's just so sad, to know that u dont feel like home when u're in ur family. it got worse without the presence and warmth of Mr A.E.

i dont have idea how long i can survive this way, i've given up all i got to sustain my relationship with him, and now what? i'm half dead without him. i cried and cried, but nobody listens, nobody realize, and nobody knows, what i really feel about him. can anyone bring just one lil' miracle so that both of us can be reunited in love once more? in the crowded city that makes me feel alone, once again, nobody knows...

today's W.C.P.S. (World Conservational Post Script) :

1. dont evr eat shark fin soup, u're making them extinct!!!

2. dont use too much plastic and oils 4 vehicles, they had started to poison us.

3. dont buy souvenirs that's made from animals (like souvenirs made of rabbits feet, turtle shells or meats, kiwi bird feathers, wolf and/or other animal body parts).

please DO pay attntion 2 the WCPS, u can save the world, just by doing small actions, u can make BIG CHANGES to the world! ((\^o^/)))

thanx very much 4 readin' my blog! i look 4ward 4 ur comments. see u again in the next post, Chiao!

love to live and live to love