Quite a few months has passed since I last updated this blog. 2 Things that I want to say over here, is that, as the title has mentioned, I made a turning point with my career. Really, being in a cubicle with lots of unpredictable matters and the scoldings and humiliation from my perfectionist and unthoughtful superior and boss does not suit me at all, h*ll yeah they never do. I'm going back to the days when I was a teacher. I'm leaving this boredom place and challenging myself back to talking in fronr of a lot of people, getting my mind into theirs. Frankly, I'm still getting nervous interacting with people, especially when it comes to talking and explaining in front of a lot of people, even in front of children. I was wondering to myself (I am still wondering though...) if I have any case of autistic and Asperger syndrome. For the ones who do not understand what is Asperger syndrome, ask Uncle Google. He knows everything *wide grin*.
Turning back might not look as easy as turning the steering wheel of a car. But I think I have to give my best *duuh...* since it's a comeback. Things might be a little embarrassing, but I do not feel any urge to 'run away' like I feel in this 'cubicle company'. I thought that I might've caused some commotions since I started hating working here.
In terms of relationships with some people, I've stumbled and injured my heart. I just did not expect for them to behave in such a manner, and I learnt that sometimes, jerks are just jerks, men are just men, and boys in them will always be boys. I do not want to mentioned what they did to me, but, in some manners, they've hurt me deep enough for me to take those memories into my grave... I'm not being grudgeful, but sometimes, pain will always be pain, and time cannot take them away from my heart. I can forgive betrayal, but I cannot give back the love like I used to. No, having such scars made me learnt quite a few things. That this world is ugly yet beautiful... and now I'm stronger. I would like to add something, what does not kill you, not only will make you stronger, but it leaves a h*ll of pain to you to suffer, and a big, ugly scar, mentally or physically.
Ok, enough talking about myself, I would like to talk about an amazaing girl, who's a 9-year-old primary school student and a food blogger in such a young age! Her blog has 40,000 visitors a day and Jamie Oliver the handsome and famous celebrity chef also visited her blog, and gave her one of his cooking books signed by himself! (talk about jealousy, Martha, I wish I could have one of Jamie's signed book too) Waow... imagine that... her name is Martha Payne, and you can Google her blog as well (I just came back from visiting her blog too :p). She's blogging about the meals she has everyday at her school canteen at lunchtime, and apparently changed the school's menu from unhealthy food into healthy meals good for the children's nutrition needs. Way to go, Martha! She's such an inspiration in a young age, talk about simple things with significant influence ;) Well, if you're curious, you can find her blog at http://neverseconds.blogspot.com.es/ and enjoy!
Hope you like what I've wrote.
Sense you later again in the next posts! \^o^/
Senin, 28 Mei 2012
Selasa, 03 Januari 2012
It Has Been a Loooooooooooong Time
How I miss my blog so much... I did not count any days which has passed since the last time I updated this blog. I have been very busy the past few months and all things seems come together at the same time. I have one surprise for you, I'm a corporate worker again, finally, at last. I'm not a teacher again, and maybe I should curse the government for not paying attention on the welfare of the teachers in this country *devil side taking over*. I'm finally sitting in this small cubicle, doing the complicated stuffs about purchasing some materials from overseas. I'm actually not really into business, but I feel that I have to do this no matter what.
I felt the urge to gain more; in terms of income. I did not reach high enough to break free in the future, so I left what I love to do in order to find perfection. I know this is something so 'not me', but I got no choice at all. I want to be independent some day, and I want to do what I really want to do, so like it or not, here I am, working things out. I just learnt that the first years would be tough and hard, but I think I have to make it happen. I have to commit, starting from now on. Things are never easy for a bigger reward, i believe that.
Leaving an occupation as a teacher is really really one hard stuff to deal with. I've always loved teaching and to be taught. I love telling stories and sharing them with children, since their minds are still clear and they like to find out and explore something they did not see, hear, or know before . I love the times when we could play games and practise English at the same time. I love the times when we crack jokes in the class to shoo away the stiffness during the tight schedule of the lessons. I just love being a part of a school, and will always be. It's just so hard to leave what I've been so enjoyed to do.
When I had to leave the school I had been working in for a year and a half, it was heartbreaking. I could not let out any tears at all, while all the other leaving teachers seemed to cry a lot when they leave that place. Are they pretending when they leave? Or they really did feel sad when the time comes? I guess I'll never know. Never. But one thing for sure, it hurts too much even tears can not flow out of my eyes. It's just so deep that i can not even express it, the shock had just consumed me until today. I want to cry, I want to expand the loss of my soul, but it seems that my soul loves torturing myself, creating the guilt and sadness for leaving a place that I liked the most, being a teacher.
Whatever it takes, I'd spread my wings and flew, I could not go back to the originated base where I could feel that I'm in a safe haven. I've stepped out of my comfort zone, and there's no turning back in the future, no matter how I will wanted to. I just hope that I can be in a better place, and there will be something I can gain, that I can be proud of, and I can break free from this prison.
I felt the urge to gain more; in terms of income. I did not reach high enough to break free in the future, so I left what I love to do in order to find perfection. I know this is something so 'not me', but I got no choice at all. I want to be independent some day, and I want to do what I really want to do, so like it or not, here I am, working things out. I just learnt that the first years would be tough and hard, but I think I have to make it happen. I have to commit, starting from now on. Things are never easy for a bigger reward, i believe that.
Leaving an occupation as a teacher is really really one hard stuff to deal with. I've always loved teaching and to be taught. I love telling stories and sharing them with children, since their minds are still clear and they like to find out and explore something they did not see, hear, or know before . I love the times when we could play games and practise English at the same time. I love the times when we crack jokes in the class to shoo away the stiffness during the tight schedule of the lessons. I just love being a part of a school, and will always be. It's just so hard to leave what I've been so enjoyed to do.
When I had to leave the school I had been working in for a year and a half, it was heartbreaking. I could not let out any tears at all, while all the other leaving teachers seemed to cry a lot when they leave that place. Are they pretending when they leave? Or they really did feel sad when the time comes? I guess I'll never know. Never. But one thing for sure, it hurts too much even tears can not flow out of my eyes. It's just so deep that i can not even express it, the shock had just consumed me until today. I want to cry, I want to expand the loss of my soul, but it seems that my soul loves torturing myself, creating the guilt and sadness for leaving a place that I liked the most, being a teacher.
Whatever it takes, I'd spread my wings and flew, I could not go back to the originated base where I could feel that I'm in a safe haven. I've stepped out of my comfort zone, and there's no turning back in the future, no matter how I will wanted to. I just hope that I can be in a better place, and there will be something I can gain, that I can be proud of, and I can break free from this prison.
Kamis, 18 Agustus 2011
Life and A Bowl of Soup
baru tadi pagi aku menyadari, banyak perubahan kecil yang datang ke dalam hidupku, walaupun ada yang positif, ataupun yang mungkin membawa pengaruh negatif, ada pula yang tetap sama saja, yang membuatku tetap skeptikal pada makna dan keberadaan sahabat sejati.
baru tadi pagi aku sadar, banyak kebiasaan kecil di rumahku yang dulu yang kini hilang setelah aku menempati rumah baru. bukan, aku tidak mengatakan soal menangisi seseorang yang sudah menginjak-injak perasaan dan juga dedikasiku padanya selama setahun beberapa bulan di dalam hidupku, tapi ini lebih pada kembali tentang keluarga, tentang tradisi kecil yang bisa membangkitkan ingatanku pada masa kecilku, yang kini telah mulai menghilang; dan aku menyadarinya berkat semangkuk sup yang dimasak oleh ibuku.
ceritanya begini, tadi pagi saat menyiapkan sarapan aku melihat Ibu menyiapkan sup untuk pelengkap makanan siang dan malam kami nanti, dan aku berpikir, sudah beberapa lama ya Ibu tidak memasak sampai se-intens ini, semenjak kami baru pindah, juga beberapa saat setelah beliau selesai operasi. karena kondisi beliau yang masih lemah, beliau tidak bisa masak di rumah, dan kami memesan rantangan untuk makanan sehari-hari. karena semangkuk sup itu aku jadi ingat, kalau dulu saat aku masih anak2, aku ogah sekali minum sup, dan harus selalu diingatkan untuk itu. aku bukannya benci pada rasa sup Ibu, rasanya enak sekali, tapi saat itu aku kurang mensyukuri adanya sup itu untukku. sekarang, aku jadi merindukannya kalau sudah lama tidak minum sup masakan ibuku, hehehehehe...
semua ini membuatku berpikir, bagaimana pekerjaanku yang sangat menyibukkan dan melelahkan membuatku menjadi buta pada perubahan yang begitu kecil di dalam hidupku. itu hanya salah satu contohnya, masih banyak hal2 kecil yang hilang semenjak aku pindah ke rumah baru ini, semuanya menjadi semacam flashback yang sangat cepat di dalam otakku hanya dalam sekejap saja, seperti semacam deja vu ataukah sedikit kesenduan yang timbul mengingat semuanya... sebelum pindah kemari, aku berpikir bahwa semuanya pasti akan sama saja setelah pindah ke rumah baru ini. semuanya tentang kami, tradisi, kebiasaan, semuanya. hanya saja aku yang saat itu belum dewasa tidak menyadari, pindah rumah juga sama saja seperti mengganti tatanan rambut, kecil kelihatannya, maknanya seolah mungil, namun, merekalah yang mempunyai kuasa mengubah kehidupanku ke jalan yang berbeda, menjadi seperti sekarang ini adanya.
kejadian-kejadian yang membuatku lebih sabar, membuatku lebih tegar, menempaku menjadi lebih kuat dan membentukku menjadi seseorang yang lebih pengertian, tidak egois, dan sebagainya. mereka mungkin sekecil kerikil, ada pula yang bentuknya mungkin hanya segenggam, namun, karena tersandung oleh mereka, aku jadi tersadar dan mencoba bangkit kembali, dengan kekuatanku sendiri dan juga orang-orang yang mencintaiku...
baru tadi pagi aku sadar, banyak kebiasaan kecil di rumahku yang dulu yang kini hilang setelah aku menempati rumah baru. bukan, aku tidak mengatakan soal menangisi seseorang yang sudah menginjak-injak perasaan dan juga dedikasiku padanya selama setahun beberapa bulan di dalam hidupku, tapi ini lebih pada kembali tentang keluarga, tentang tradisi kecil yang bisa membangkitkan ingatanku pada masa kecilku, yang kini telah mulai menghilang; dan aku menyadarinya berkat semangkuk sup yang dimasak oleh ibuku.
ceritanya begini, tadi pagi saat menyiapkan sarapan aku melihat Ibu menyiapkan sup untuk pelengkap makanan siang dan malam kami nanti, dan aku berpikir, sudah beberapa lama ya Ibu tidak memasak sampai se-intens ini, semenjak kami baru pindah, juga beberapa saat setelah beliau selesai operasi. karena kondisi beliau yang masih lemah, beliau tidak bisa masak di rumah, dan kami memesan rantangan untuk makanan sehari-hari. karena semangkuk sup itu aku jadi ingat, kalau dulu saat aku masih anak2, aku ogah sekali minum sup, dan harus selalu diingatkan untuk itu. aku bukannya benci pada rasa sup Ibu, rasanya enak sekali, tapi saat itu aku kurang mensyukuri adanya sup itu untukku. sekarang, aku jadi merindukannya kalau sudah lama tidak minum sup masakan ibuku, hehehehehe...
semua ini membuatku berpikir, bagaimana pekerjaanku yang sangat menyibukkan dan melelahkan membuatku menjadi buta pada perubahan yang begitu kecil di dalam hidupku. itu hanya salah satu contohnya, masih banyak hal2 kecil yang hilang semenjak aku pindah ke rumah baru ini, semuanya menjadi semacam flashback yang sangat cepat di dalam otakku hanya dalam sekejap saja, seperti semacam deja vu ataukah sedikit kesenduan yang timbul mengingat semuanya... sebelum pindah kemari, aku berpikir bahwa semuanya pasti akan sama saja setelah pindah ke rumah baru ini. semuanya tentang kami, tradisi, kebiasaan, semuanya. hanya saja aku yang saat itu belum dewasa tidak menyadari, pindah rumah juga sama saja seperti mengganti tatanan rambut, kecil kelihatannya, maknanya seolah mungil, namun, merekalah yang mempunyai kuasa mengubah kehidupanku ke jalan yang berbeda, menjadi seperti sekarang ini adanya.
kejadian-kejadian yang membuatku lebih sabar, membuatku lebih tegar, menempaku menjadi lebih kuat dan membentukku menjadi seseorang yang lebih pengertian, tidak egois, dan sebagainya. mereka mungkin sekecil kerikil, ada pula yang bentuknya mungkin hanya segenggam, namun, karena tersandung oleh mereka, aku jadi tersadar dan mencoba bangkit kembali, dengan kekuatanku sendiri dan juga orang-orang yang mencintaiku...
Jumat, 12 Agustus 2011
Bagian Promosi Ni Ye...
ok guys, kalo ada yang tertarik ke Rahmat museum yang tadi aku sebutin di post sebelumnya, alamatnya ada di:
Rahmat International Wildlife Museum and Gallery
Jl. S Parman 309 Medan
buat ulasan sebelum pergi ke sana bisa dilihat di salah 1 blog yang berhasil w google barusan, di :
http://thearoengbinangproject.com/2010/06/wisata-rahmat/
ulasannya lumayan lengkap, ada foto2 referensi juga, dan bisa dengan gampang juga di-google di internet, all right? see u on the next post! ;D
(mudah2an dikasi 2 tiket gratis from Mr Rahmat Syah setelah aku promosiin Rahmat Museumnya,hehehehe... *ngarep*)
Rahmat International Wildlife Museum and Gallery
Jl. S Parman 309 Medan
buat ulasan sebelum pergi ke sana bisa dilihat di salah 1 blog yang berhasil w google barusan, di :
http://thearoengbinangproject.com/2010/06/wisata-rahmat/
ulasannya lumayan lengkap, ada foto2 referensi juga, dan bisa dengan gampang juga di-google di internet, all right? see u on the next post! ;D
(mudah2an dikasi 2 tiket gratis from Mr Rahmat Syah setelah aku promosiin Rahmat Museumnya,hehehehe... *ngarep*)
What an Eventful Day!
today has been a very eventful day for me, first is the Children's Day for my kindergarten class and one more is the field trip to Rahmat Museum and Gallery with my primary students, in this post, i'm gonna give u some footage of this eventful day and some great footage i did took while i was at the Rahmat Gallery Medan, enjoy folks ;)
these footage are from Rahmat Museum n Gallery, because the lighting is sometimes too dim, my cellphone camera couldnt really produce cool pictures... ;(
well, that's all that i can present to you from today's adventurous event,chiao!look forward to the next posts! ;)
these footage are from Rahmat Museum n Gallery, because the lighting is sometimes too dim, my cellphone camera couldnt really produce cool pictures... ;(
well, that's all that i can present to you from today's adventurous event,chiao!look forward to the next posts! ;)
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